Welcome to my Blog.
today is July 20, 011
Hi there friends/ family
I thank u for taking the time to enter a glimps of my world & how i handled life with heart desease i was born with/going through life with learning differences.
Life for me was and is not easy. I survied my first heart
surgry when i was 14 months old. Mom and I lived in tywon where she had worked for the government. I had gotten sick more when she relised my lips were turning blue purple and having trouble breathing. So mom and I flew to the us to washington dc childrens hospital!
I had my firt oppen heart surgy.
the Dr that worked on me was a believer and prayed over his patientce. ! He had told my mom that i was having a hard time and may not survive this dificult heart surgry, Mom was not a beliver so she got on her knees and prayed in the waiting rm, " God Carrie is yours weather she lives or doesnt make it. " I trust u"
ever since then My mom was a believer! and as i grew older i had three oppen heart surgries and a pacemaker, Over the years that first pacemaker got turned off around Christmas day when i was age 21~! that was the best exciting Christmas gift for me i ever had. I accepted Christ in my heart when i was 11, because age two 1/2 i remember playing drs with my mom and pounding on her chest listening to her heart beat, mom asked me "is that what the drs did for me during the surgry time??? i cried and said yes. My mom asked me Carrie did u see jesus?" as a 2 year old playing drs with my mom on the floor in our living rm i burst out crying. I said yes mommy i saw him and he went away!!! " mom asked me if i remembered what He told me i said "yes i do. he wanted me to live, and he has hope and plans for me. " !! and I cried and cried and said He went away!"
You know I grew up with out knowing who my dad was i remembered my dad leaving me for the first time since 3 yrs old. that was when my heart was broken and as a little girl i didnt know what or why.
So 1994 when i was 7 mom and i moved hear to colorado to be close to my moms sister and family. we stayed with them until mom found a job and our home. I grew up with out my dad alway asking mom why and where he's at mom was always honest with me and i loved that. i was really greatful for her telling me, even though it was very hard to hear and understand. mom and i grew up together going to church and have God the most important in our lives. As i was age two playing drs i remembered as a child that i saw jesus. u probably have heard many stories of children seeing God nearly dying, and till this day God has kept me close. i accepted jesus in my heart when i was age 11, good strange thing one day the service was about how God is our heavenly father to all who accept christ. and that if i draw near to him he will draw near to me, That time was close to fathers day and i always got emotional over that time of event. so i said that prayer that changed my life for the best:)
so all i know not to preach at u my friends, but im just telling u my story u may not agree u may disbeleave, but its what happend to me as a child. having three oppen heart surgries almost not survived/ growing up with low confidance as a child, not feeling not good about who i am and why God let me go through all these difficult surgries and being in pain as a child. My mom has always been there for me and took care of me, as a mom and as a dad going to all my sports things in school. as u can imagine my mom and i have always been close we've had our moments like always but what mother and daughter doesnt???!! so God doesnt give us the bad times because he is the cause God is not a god of even he has no part in evil, we are just humans and when we are born with heart desease / learning differences/ we have to just accept and make the best we can make out of it it may not be during my school years, my confidance grew in christ over the years. not when i said the prayer at age 11. things were still hard and painful. God is faithful to complete till the end. He never forgoten about me, all he wants us to do is to make him first in our hearts and he will walk with us when we see one set of foot prints in the sand thats when He carries us. saying the prayer is not majic its the start of a adventure. you are reading from a person who knows pain and heart ache and im just sharing with u that i made Lemons with that Lemonaid!!" I hope u will do the same in your life where ever u are @. Pain or no Pain He wants to Carry you:)
